Problems Are Waiting To Be Solved – Master This Life Skill
Problems are waiting for you to solve them. Are you someone who sees a problem in your life as a bad thing? or
Are you someone who sees a problem as a good thing? It’s like the age-old question “Do you see the cup half empty or half full?”
Problems are not bad to have in your life. If you have nothing you need to solve or overcome in a day how full is your life? Problems do not need to mean DRAMA or crazy making stuff that happens to all of us.
Problems are things that arise in our lives every day they are given to us to learn to solve. A problem is something that needs you to deal with it. Just think back on the last problem you solved and how great you felt. Solving your own problems will help you raise your own self-esteem.
When we are children we have parents, who help us solve problems, sometimes they even solve them for you. Not always a good thing for you. The younger you are when you start to learn to solve problems the better you will get when you get older.
Teenagers want to solve their own problems. This is a good thing. What teens need is guidance, a chance to figure things out, fail, get back up, dust themselves off and try again and master this life skill. The parents become the biggest cheerleader.
As a child, teenager or even adult when we face problems we will often do one of three things: freeze, run, or fight.
Sometimes our instincts will kick in and we will solve our problems based on impulsive emotions. Not the best solution.
Below are seven things to consider when you face a problem that is looking for a solution.
1. The way you look at the problem will decide how you solve the problem.
If you look at it with determination and resolve you will find a way to overcome the obstacle and find the solution. If you look at it as if it is something that is being “done to you” or from a place of “why me” then you need to consider changing your mind. Feeling “done to” or asking “why me” will not help you solve your problem.
Solving problems takes practice.
The more problems you solve the more success you will see in your life. Very successful people learn to solve many problems and they do not stay stuck (or frozen) for any length of time. They move on and make things happen, even if it does not work and they must try something else. They are not afraid to fail. They just keep moving along with calculated action to solve their problems.
2. Is the problem life threatening.
Do I need to get help immediately or is it something that I can solve given a cool head and time?
If your problem is something that is putting you, someone else or an animal in danger and you cannot stop it on your own, get help!
The longer you wait to reach out to someone the worse the situation may get. If you are unable to get help leave.
As I stated above, freeze, and get help or run and get away from the situation. It is not the best idea to fight, as someone is going to get hurt, even though it could be your first response.
Nothing good will come from a head-on fight with someone when both parties are angry. It is not a great way to solve a life-threatening problem. If you are in danger run and get help to solve your problem!
3. This problem will end.
There are several studies on anxiety and worry and I have read that often 8% of what we worry about will come true. Source: The Essence of Success by Earl Nightingale. Edited by Carson V. Conant.
What that means to you is that 92% or what you are worrying about will not happen. Just knowing that will help you to stop and think about your problem in a different way.
Problems will come and go in your life. The better you get at solving them the more life you will have.
If you find yourself stuck in a circle of worry stop and ask yourself some questions: What am I afraid of? What step(s) can I take now to help me feel better? Is what I am worrying about really true or is it something I have made up in my mind? If you are not sure and it involves someone else, go to them and ask them questions to help you confirm your thoughts. Endless worry is a freeze response that will keep you stuck and even sending you spiraling out of control if you let it.
Stop and breath deeply at least 5 times. Remember: All things eventually pass and change into something else. Nothing stays the same.
If you work at making it better it will improve. Give it time and relax into the process of solving the problem.
4. Always be accountable – you have created the problem you are in.
Accountability is a hard concept to understand. There are hundreds of books written on this very topic. Everything we go through in life we have created for ourselves. If you can simply accept that what you are going through you have created, then you can take steps to never let it happen again, solve the problem and move on.
Blaming other people or things for our problems does not make the problem go away. It just keeps you frozen.
If you are taking responsibility for what is happening, you are likely moving in a forward motion of making the problem better. Sometimes it may seem easier to blame everyone around you for what is taking place but, in the long run you will be the one that stays stuck and does not get the results you want in your life. Own up and start thinking of solutions instead of blaming the world for the problem you face.
If you have created this, you can also create a solution to fix it. We all are born with a genius inside. Stop, breath and listen to your instinct, the answers will come.
5. You are not on this planet alone.
For every problem you face, there are thousands of people out their wanting to help you solve the problem.
If you want to solve all your own problems get your own planet.
Solve your problems sooner by asking for help. Not asking for problems is a form of flight, running from the problem instead of letting others know you have one and getting the help that you need. Stop running and start asking for support.
6. Feel the fear and do it anyway.
Often when we have problems we start to worry, we allow our brains to dwell in negative thoughts and the problem somehow seems to get bigger. Fear is the problem you are having. A fear of what others might think, of not being good enough, of getting hurt….what ever it is, it is likely not real.
Sometimes the fear we think about is not reality based and we need to simply do something or stop thinking about what might go wrong. Many people have the fear of failure.
Successful people feel fear but they know they will must go through some failures to find the gem and success they are looking for.
We all need to go through times of solving problems, some more difficult than others. Don’t let the fear of anything stop you from solving your most pressing problems today!
7. Own up to your responsibilities as a leader
Leaders solve more problems than most people.
If you strive to lead, you will need to see problems as something that needs solving.
If you come up with a solution you think is going to work and it does not, move on to plan B. Having a back up plan is always a good plan when solving problems. If that, then this. If that does not work, then do this. By having a plan for what might happen if your first plan does not work.
The next time you have a problem take it on like it is your best friend looking for help. After all a problem is looking for a solution and needs you to solve it. Mastering this life skill is a great problem to solve.
Till next time,